Not Fade Away
Jun 2nd, 2008 | By Suzanne | Category: Self-Care | |
I’m gonna tell you how it’s gonna be
You’re gonna give your love to me
Love to last more than one day
Well love is love and not fade away
Well love is love and not fade away
Well love is love and not fade away
Love, love is love and not fade away
Not fade away
Not fade away
Whether this last verse brings to mind for you Buddy Holly or the Rolling Stones matters not. You might not even know the song, at all. And don’t worry, I’m not going to go off on a long diatribe about the twisted ways in which songs like this skew our image of self. Nope. I’m gonna leave it alone. This time…
What’s got this song playing endlessly in my head, is a post of Tom’s over at Delightful Work (yes, again! The bugger writes stuff that just gets in my face here lately. It is his ‘delightful work’ to do so, he brags.) In Speak Freely or Die, he writes:
Without your fears who are you? Really consider this question for a bit. Who are you without your fears? Are you more or less yourself? Are you happier? Stronger? In the absence of fear are you not more carefree?
What good might happen if you decided let go of your fears and freely express? When we hold back from revealing our whole truth, aren’t we saying that the opinions of others matter more to us than our own? Isn’t this a pretty small way to live?
See what I mean? Ugh!
Tom’s blog is about pursuing work life freedom, and if you’re self-employed or want to be, I suggest you subscribe to his feed and let him get in your face on a regular basis.
Anyway, in my comment, I shared how it was my personal life (or so I thought) where I was, for so long, unwilling or unable to speak freely, and my spirit withered and almost died as a result. Almost. But you know what? When your spirit is withering and dying, it’s not affecting just one area of your life - it affects your WHOLE life, because it affects YOU.
That song, or rather, that phrase - ‘not fade away’ - has been stuck in my head all weekend and I realize it’s because I’ve been playing small still. Here. With you. And it stops now, because by censoring myself here, by not speaking freely, I’m withering my spirit. Damn that.
So, here it is folks - and ladies? I’m talking mainly to you - your purpose in this life is to love yourself and by doing so, be the unique, wonderful, singularly glorious being that is you in every aspect of your life - not fade away.
If you can’t speak freely, be your real self without the fear of disappointing someone or pissing someone off, you’re withering your spirit, too. You know it. You feel it.
If your gut is telling you there’s got to be more to this life than what you’re living, that something’s “off”, something’s “missing”, it’s right. There is, or it wouldn’t be messing with you. You know it. You feel it.
You don’t have to know what “it” is, you just have to be willing to figure it out. Seriously consider joining me in Coaching Without Reservations.
I’m willing to stick my neck out. Are you?
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See Also:
- When You Screw Up, Own Up
- Hope Is A Decision
- Who’s Driving YOUR Bus?
- Why Your Bliss and Not Something Else?
- What You Really Mean When You Say You Have Reservations
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June 2nd, 2008 8:26 am :
Great article, Suzanne. The best part about authenticity is that it feels risky - at first. And then we realize that our life gets much, much easier … taking that first leap of faith is the hard part. Thanks for this great reminder!
Andrea Hess | Empowered Souls last blog post..Sharing Our Evolution
June 3rd, 2008 6:32 am :
Suzanne I applaud you for deciding to quit playing small. As you’ve found this can be an ongoing commitment.
We think we have stood up and spoken up and then if we really observe ourselves in action we see that we can
still stand a little taller and speak a little freer. Soon a certain level of evolution results from our awareness and that’s why I say enlightenment can be a bitch. Once we reach that level of awareness we can’t go back and put our heads in the sand even if we’d like to. I admire your stance and enthusiasm for expressing the real you.
Tom Volkar / Delightful Works last blog post..Speak Freely or Die
June 4th, 2008 8:35 am :
Andrea - you’re right - being who we really are is easier, once we have the nerve to do it. So much drama is caused by trying to be someone we’re not, or by being a smaller, less authentic version of ourselves. Of course, it FEELS like we’d create all kinds of drama if we ‘outed’ our real selves, and maybe in the beginning, that’s true. But the peace and inner calm that comes from knowing who you are and being that person in the world is far greater.
June 4th, 2008 8:40 am :
Tom - yes, enlightenment can be a bitch! LOL I’ve said that myself before, particularly surrounding the issue of that awareness we gain that we can’t go back on. It’s like peeling an onion - there always seems to be another layer. That’s why my motto is “progress, not perfection.” I don’t think, as human beings, we ever get ‘there’. We can get closer, but not ‘there’ - and that’s ok.