Some days self-employment sucks the big one.

Today is one of those days.

And because I know that my current trauma is only an illusion, I find this Lynn Anderson song from way back stuck in my head:

I beg your pardon,
I never promised you a rose garden.

I could sing you a tune or promise you the moon,
But if that’s what it takes to hold you,
I’d just as soon let you go, but there’s one thing I want you to know.
You better look before you leap, still waters run deep,
And there won’t always be someone there to pull you out,
And you know what I’m talkin’ about.
So smile for a while and let’s be jolly:
Love shouldn’t be so melancholy.
Come along and share the good times while we can.

I beg your pardon,
I never promised you a rose garden.
Along with the sunshine,
There’s gotta be a little rain sometimes.

Little did I know, all those nights I laid awake as a kid, listening to the only radio station my little transistor radio could pull in at night after my mother threatened to take me out if I didn’t go to sleep, would have any kind of positive effect on me 35 years later. It was a country station, and to this day, I can sing along with just about every Top 40 country song from the late ’60s to the late ’70s. (Which is why I sometimes go to sleep with my MP3 player playing audio training calls I’ve recorded – the information still goes into the ol’ gray matter, whether I’m “paying attention”, or not. Weird how that works.)

The point is there are going to be days when you call up your coach and say, “Please remind me again why it is self-employment is better than a job. Why is this better than going somewhere, doing my thing for 8 hours and collecting a paycheck? Because you know everything else I’m responsible for will still be there waiting on me…I just wouldn’t have all the responsibility of an entire business piled on top of it all.” (Note: this is one very good reason – of many – to have a coach. So you have one to call up to talk you down out of whatever tree you find yourself in.)

Every successful entrepreneur you have ever looked at and thought, “I want what s/he has,” has had days like this…and likely still does. I do. Some of you out there look at me and think this very thought. (That realization still surprises me, by the way. Because, you know…I’m just me, after all. But I know some of you think it because you’ve said it out loud to me.)

So, if I’m sitting here thinking it about the people I admire and aspire to be like, and you are sitting there thinking it about me…guess what? There’s probably someone, somewhere, thinking it about you. (Gasp!) But it’s very likely true.

Now, does just knowing that someone else has a really crappy time of it in their business on occasion really make me feel any better? Should it, you?

Yes. Here’s why.

Bad days are just part of the deal. It’s not just me. It’s not just you. Along with the sunshine, there’s gotta be a little rain sometimes.

Some days self-employment sucks the big one.

But – by far – most don’t.

And in the words of my most excellent coach, “…But mostly self-employment is better because you get to do your own shit in your own way.”

Amen.

It may be a simple question, but the answer has far-reaching effects in your life. If you don’t think you can do something, it’s very likely you won’t even try. You won’t put the time, effort or energy into it because, after all, it would be a waste, right? And who has time, effort or energy to waste these days?

On the other hand, if you think you can do something, you’re probably more than willing to invest the time, effort and energy into it because you’re pretty sure you’ll get the result you’re after.

So what makes the difference between thinking you can’t and thinking you can do something? For most of us, it’s proof. Proof in the form of results, past results, most likely. Where does that leave you if you’re looking at trying something completely new? Empty-handed? Not necessarily.

Just because you’ve never done a particular thing before does not mean you lack proof of your ability. All you have to do is rewind back to the last time you had to do something you thought you couldn’t do, but did. Guess what? There’s your proof. We each have things in our past that we thought for sure were going to ‘eat our lunch’, but didn’t.

There was a time in my life that I thought there was NO WAY I’d be able to earn a living from home without a job. I have three kids, a mortgage and a car payment, for crying out loud, plus I’m single with no other income to rely on! Well, guess what I’ve been doing since December of 2002?

Maybe for you it’s your managing your website or blog, or writing effective marketing copy, or picking up the phone and reaching out to a prospective new client, or any number of other things that loom over you.

Matters not. You’ve got proof. And the really good news is that “proof” from one area of your life transfers over to any other area of your life, because the proof is really about all the times – in any situation or context – that you did something you didn’t think you could do.

What can you change your mind about today and think you can, instead?