Each of us has a list of events or circumstances for which we’ve predetermined our responses, so sure that no matter the situation, we’ll follow through and protect the lines we’ve pre-drawn in the sand.

For each of us, there is another list, created from the first, of said events and circumstances which life has dropped squarely in our laps, just this side of the aforementioned pre-drawn lines.

The challenge is how to negotiate these discrepancies between what we’ve said we’d do and what we actually do once we find ourselves eyeball-deep in an event that looks and feels nothing like we expected.

Of course, we can always beg off holding ourselves accountable to the decisions we made before we were faced with the reality rather than the far-off “what if”. That’s what most people do, I suppose. And maybe rightly so.

But don’t we lose a valuable opportunity for learning about life if we do that? Don’t we pass on yet another opportunity to get to know who we really are? Through contrast comes clarity, and while it might be less than comfortable to look at the disparity in our choices, if we’re brave enough to look, we just might learn something valuable…something that might lessen - or God forbid - prevent future stress?

Somewhere along the way, donkeys - at least the ones in my life - have learned to fly. Here of late, I’ve been inundated with events to which I’ve reacted exactly the opposite of how I always thought I would. Rather than let myself off the hook for moving (or sometimes completely ignoring) those lines I drew so long ago, I’m taking the often uncomfortable path and looking for what changed, where and why?

Armed now with experience rather than extrapolation, I’m buoyed by the fact that the decisions I make today are being made by a woman who knows herself much better than before, has much more faith in herself and God, and understands and has made her peace with the fact that the only constant in this life is change.

I’d say that’s the biggest milestone to date.